I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
