The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize
