It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
