Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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