My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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