So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
