actually, I'm a sock model
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
