we're blogging at a bar
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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