You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
