week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize