Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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