I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
