On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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