You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
