is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
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