I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
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