I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
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