quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
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