There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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