rhymes with "ouble enetration"
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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