you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Mom said you looked used
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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