There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Randomize
