I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
