Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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