well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
