I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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