So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
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He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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