so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize
