I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
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