We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
