Texts From Last Night

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  (253): View more from Washington

  The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls

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  (253): The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls http://tfl.nu/7h32
  Replies (33) Good night (1657) Bad night (2860)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.

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  (847): I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever. http://tfl.nu/av4z
  Replies (15) Good night (891) Bad night (4389)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter

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  (918): The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter http://tfl.nu/j5l8
  Replies (13) Good night (8526) Bad night (1209)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.

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  (573): and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex. http://tfl.nu/r14v
  Replies (13) Good night (2662) Bad night (1060)
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  (607): View more from New York

  She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.

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  (607): She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her. http://tfl.nu/f1tk
  Replies (7) Good night (4510) Bad night (1018)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge

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  (519): There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge http://tfl.nu/5e7p
  Replies (5) Good night (1667) Bad night (819)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.

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  (720): I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else. http://tfl.nu/ss1v
  Replies (4) Good night (1259) Bad night (761)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it

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  (215): It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it http://tfl.nu/0xgu
  Replies (9) Good night (1921) Bad night (886)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?

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  (719): Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing? http://tfl.nu/0la5
  Replies (2) Good night (1297) Bad night (517)
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  (523): View more from

  I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower

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  (523): I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower http://tfl.nu/3y30
  Replies (4) Good night (761) Bad night (317)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.

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  (907): I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused. http://tfl.nu/yzqj
  Replies (6) Good night (498) Bad night (608)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store

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  (407): If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store http://tfl.nu/imig
  Replies (7) Good night (1771) Bad night (421)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea

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  (727): I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea http://tfl.nu/2xog
  Replies (0) Good night (433) Bad night (358)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad

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  (540): And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad http://tfl.nu/nf3b
  Replies (4) Good night (213) Bad night (315)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.

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  (406): Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve. http://tfl.nu/3mfl
  Replies (1) Good night (628) Bad night (133)

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