I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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