Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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