Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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