after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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