Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I need to wash the frat house off of me
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Randomize
