Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
