You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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