The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
