physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize