I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I think pants incapable of making pants work
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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