There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
