Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I think your dad took our porno
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
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