But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
