You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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