oh god the rape fog is back!
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Randomize
