Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
