This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
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Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
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On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
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