He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I just want nice things and good sex
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize