Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
