That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
